Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Techniques to Win Over Shyness in Preschoolers

Children behave differently. There are those who are naturally friendly and would respond to everything around them with glee most of the time. But there are those who refuse to let their guards down until they are very comfortable with the people whom they are interacting with. This is very evident in many cases of shyness in preschoolers. This is very true for kids who have been very sheltered by their parents and other loved ones at home, especially those who do not get to play with other kids their age most of the time. A lot of them find it hard to relate to other people, even kids their age, because they cannot easily adapt to the changes that they experience once they enter school.

If you are a parent who has this dilemma, you have to understand what your kids are going through. You have to support them every step of the way. At the start, you need to be by their side constantly. This must be done until you feel like they are ready to take things on their own. Here are some techniques on how you may go about the matter.

1. You must take things at a time. You must understand that at this point, you should think about the steps that you ought to do to be able to help your child. You must integrate things that can help them gain confidence and they should feel your support through it all. You must allow them to do things according to their preference and capabilities.

2. You should not put too much pressure on your kids. If you want them to change their attitude, you will not achieve that if you are going to pound on them every so often whatever you want to happen. You must not expect them to act like other active kids. Instead of following you, they might turn against the idea and also turn away from kids whom you keep comparing them with.

3. Set good examples of what you preach. It will be easier for your kids to understand what you are trying to tell them by being good examples of what you would want them to be. You must encourage them to speak their minds whenever they are being asked certain questions and at times when there are people who are talking to them. You should also tag them along with you at occasions where they will be exposed to many people, especially on events where there will be many children.

4. Involve your kids in role playing games where you will ask them to do roles that reflect the kind of person that you want them to become. This serves as a practice for them to know what to do in instances if they are not shy. You should prepare for the game and give them roles that will inspire them to do the same acts if ever they will be faced with the same situations in the future.

You can do your share to counter shyness in preschoolers as long as you are focused on the task and you firmly believe that you can achieve the goals that you have set for them.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Handling Shyness Through Self-Motivation

Shyness is one of the hardest issues that a person must deal with. This is because fighting shyness would require an overall assessment of one's self—among others—to become successful

Experts say that one of the easiest ways to start dealing with shyness is through self-motivation. Indeed, motivation keeps people moving. This is one thing that helps them achieve goals that they have set for themselves. However, not all people are able to motivate themselves easily. There are those that who rely or depend on other people or experiences just to keep them going. Although getting motivation from other people or experiences might work, it is best if one learns how to motivate himself or herself on their own.

Getting started

Motivating one's self is a process where one needs lots of reflection and self-assessment. These are very important in dealing with shyness because it will help the person to know what are his or her strengths as well as his or her weaknesses. If one knows of his or her strengths, that person will be able to continue what he or she is doing and even enhance it.

On the other hand, knowing one's weaknesses is as equally as important because through this, the person will know what the areas he or she should improve on. If one knows his or her weaknesses, he or she might be able to deal with shyness easily and can even turn these into opportunities that will make him or her successful in the future.

If you are one of those who would want to get started on self-motivation to deal with shyness, the first thing that you need to set your mind into it. By having a mindset that you would want to get started on self-motivation and stick with it until you are successful, you will be inspired to overcome the feelings and hesitations you have. Setting your mind into something will help you look forward to the results of what you are aiming for. For you to have a proper mindset, it is best to clear your mind from negative thoughts so you can think clearly. Once you have done this, you will have an idea where to start with self-motivation.

The next best thing to do is to start with small and simple tasks in dealing with shyness. Overcoming shyness might be easy for some but for others, this is a very difficult feat to achieve. For people who feel that starting with self-motivation to deal with shyness, this can be overwhelming. So, the best way is to start with small and simple goals to achieve. If one starts small and simple, he or she will be able to accomplish these goals the easier and faster way. If simple goals are set and achieved this early, you will be able to earn self-confidence that you will need in facing greater and bigger challenges ahead of you.

Experts agree that self-motivation is a very important factor for people who are aiming to overcome shyness for good. This is also important because it gives the person a sense of freedom in choosing paths that he or she has to take. Through self-motivation, people are given the chance to maneuver or control their own lives which in the future will help them be the best persons that they want to be.

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Alternative Approaches To Overcome Shyness

Experts say that it is only common for people to feel shyness, anxiety and defeat if life has been giving them so many tests and trials. However, instead of feeling depressed and sulking into the taste of defeat be because of being too shy, people can use this as an opportunity to make themselves stronger. This can be done by using these emotions and experiences to motivate his or herself in battling with shyness.

Options in dealing with shyness

Today, with modern technology and continuous advancement in research, overcoming shyness could be fast and easy. All one needs to do is to gather enough willpower to face his or her fear and the willingness to overcome that fear no matter what it takes.

Once the final diagnosis has been made by the psychologist, the person who has extreme shyness can now start with treatments depending in the severity of the phobia. Nowadays, the most common treatment options available in overcoming shyness include drug therapy, natural remedies, and various relaxation techniques. Each of these offer different concepts and processes so it's up to the person which one could be suitable to his or her needs.

The drug therapy could be the mildest form of treatment available for people who are starting in overcoming extreme shyness. Once diagnosis is made by the psychologist or psychiatrist, the most common drug prescription that they give include benzodiazepines and other relaxant drugs which are proven to control the symptoms of the phobia for a certain period of time. Although some can be bought over the counter, always remember to check with your health provider which drugs may help you overcome what your fear in dealing with others. Their approval and prescription is very important because these will ensure that the problem will not get more complicated.

If you want to go the natural way, there are certain natural remedies that can be made or taken at home to help you control anxiety attacks during social events. These herbs include St John’s Wort, Scullcap, Passiflora incarnate, and Valerian are recommended because these are believed to help calm the person's nerves while extreme shyness attacks. Because these contain properties that help people to relax, many are trying this treatment option. But since herbal or natural remedies don’t necessarily have clinical approval, it is best to test first the effects of these herbs before you finally use it.

Since anxiety is the main culprit for shyness, people who are experiencing this are advised to various techniques that would help them relax such as meditation and deep breathing as well as muscle relaxation. People who are afraid to socialize are advised to practice these techniques at home so once they have mastered it; they can try using these relaxation methods as often as possible.

Learning these techniques is important because it will help the person reduce his or her anxiety, relieve the tension brought by the fear, and enable that person to take off his or her mind into untoward things such as embarrassment in front of a person or a crowd.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Common Causes Of Shyness

At one time or another in our lives, we have had experienced shyness. As children, it is a normal temporary behavior, considered part of normal development.

It comes in roughly two waves: first, at around the ages of 5 to 6 months and again at about age 2. Shyness becomes evident at about age 3. Problems arise when shyness hampers with the child’s relationships with the others, in social situations, school, etc.

Defined as a fear of, or withdrawal from other people or social situations, shyness may have several causes depending on the particular child and the specific circumstances.

Shyness is a behavior parents should not ignore on their child. On the part of the child, it can be a very painful emotion to live with, and it will definitely affect the other aspects of his life all the way to his adulthood.

For starters, shy children develop low self-esteem and its attendant lack of self-confidence. This results into a real difficulty for the shy child to make friends. Moreover, they do not usually receive the needed help from their teachers.

Some reasons for shyness

As had been cited before, shyness can have several causes. Each case, however, is unique for each child. Some may have one specific cause, while others may have a combination of causes that feed on each other.

*Heredity Some research showed that shyness runs in the family. However, science could not yet pinpoint if there is a specific gene for it. It could be that children learn the shyness behavior from their parents through example.

*Modeling or learned behavior. As is noted from the above observations, children may have acquired their shyness habit from watching how their parents interact with other people. As statistics show, shy parents usually have shy children.

*Difficulty with frequent exposure to new situations. Children are repeatedly exposed to new situations. Unfortunately, not all children can cope with these, and those that cannot tend to withdraw.

*Overprotective parents. Children who are overprotected lack the opportunities to be socially independent. Growing up, they lack the confidence needed to make their own decisions. Their later insecurities will trigger shyness.

*Inconsistent parenting. Parenting practices that are not consistent cause confusion and insecurity in children. This behavior can lead to shyness. Examples would be punishing the child for a breach of rules at one time and yet letting it pass on the next incidence.

*Lack of parental involvement. Some parents believe that letting children on their own promotes a child’s independent attitude. This is a mistake because children with no experience need constant guidance from parents. Other parents don’t have the time nor the inclination to involve themselves. This is another tragic mistake. Decreased parental involvement makes the child believe his unworthy status and will feel uncomfortable in social situations.

Teasing, threats, criticisms. When children are frequently teased, threatened or criticized either by their family or by other people, they will eventually develop the expectation of only negative feedback from others. This will lead to their evading actions in social situations and contact with other people.

These are just some of the more visible causes of shyness in children. Fortunately, shyness is not a difficult problem to correct.  However, the correction process needs the full cooperation and total commitment from the parents themselves.